Your Questions About Back To School Gifts For Kindergarten

Jenny asks…

A question for a kindergarten parent/teacher, please help me?

I don’t know what I can do. Kindergarten is mandatory in TN, than this year I enrolled my child in kindergarten (for 2 month I couldn’t enroll her last year). I feel like my child is just losing time, because they teaching things that her already know. I spoke with everybody in school, but nobody helped me. I tried make they do a gifted test for her. They say that the result of test not was enough for move her to first grade. They don’t want teach her different things from the curriculum.
I’ m really sad, I don’t now what to do. Today she come back from school with a note from the teacher that say she knows the letters “B,b,C,c” and their sound, and she can count to 20.
In this moment, while I writing, she is reading another “Magic tree house book”. She can add and subtract number (such 12+21+35 and 16-9), she can count to 100, skipping by 2,3,5,10. She can write her complete name curly, write 60-70 words stories and more. I feel like she is just losing her time.
I don’t feel to homeschool her first because I don’t know good english, second because she is only child and we are from Europe, and many people are razzist, than is really hard for to have friend.
I don’ t have enough money for private school.
not very advanced for a kindergartener?? If in her class they are teaching the abc and she can read 86 pages books, while the ather children learn how to coun to 20 she is counting to 100…… Back a grade were? preschool??
For Zakia: if you like, you can email me.

Betty answers:

Keep fostering her abilities at home they way it seems you are. There dosn’t seem to be much you can do- possibly when she is in first or second grade, if she is still that advanced, either her teachers will notice and she will be moved ahead a grade, or at that point you can talk to the teachers again. Does her school have a program for gifted children? Thats an alternative to skipping a grade right now. Schools dont like to have such young children skip grades for some reason. Dont worry, just keep letting her read any books she shows intrest in, and doing math, and writing stories at home, and take her to museums (on free days) and other places that will foster her learning, like the zoo, planetarium, aquarium. Those places have people that can answer any questions she might have, so she will be learning! Also, make sure she does all her homework- when children are advanced and the work is not challenging, they may not do it because they already know the material!! Always let her know how proud of her you are! She sounds great!!

Mark asks…

horrible first day of kindergarten?

My daughter just started kindergarten Tuesday. she has been super excited for months now about going to school and making friends, learning, etc. I have had concerns, as she is highly gifted and has far far advanced the academics of kindergarten and 1st-2nd grade even. she also has never played well with children her age, has extreme sensitivities, excitabilities, extremely independant, tries testing waters and trying to outsmart and manipulate ALOT.. she is a GREAT girl.. so full of love and always uses manners perfectly. always shares. wonderful, but advanced, sense of humor. i could go on and on… but the point im getting to is i had alot of concren for these “issues” and her going to school, so i told the teacher of it all and she was all smiles and “it will be just fine”…basicly. so i go in to pick her up at 3 and she isnt talking much so i ask her about her day and in a not so enthusiastic voice, i get “school is fun”. so i ask what she enjoyed and she avoids the question and says “i dont know” and i asked if there was anything she didnt like… and she says “in gym when the teacher smacked me” i was enraged, to say the least. but i collecte dmyself and waited for my husband to meet with me and the teacher later in the evening. the teacher told us basicly all negative things on my daughter. how she wouldnt sit for the reading of words on the bulletin board. how she wanted to cut out the pictures she’d colored (only the teacher was allowed to cut, bc the other students hadnt been taught yet) though my daughter can use scissors very well. she said she wasnt in gym class, only the PE instructors are there. and i tell her what my daughter said and the teacher looks shocked and says she’s never heard of any gym teacher doing such a thing and she sort of rolls her eyes and mentions how my daughter was a wreck when she went to pick her up at the gym. i informed her that my child is no liar, never has been. she has always been very truthful, no matter what the situation. the teacher goes on to say how when my daughter kept crying she couldnt console her so she just left her alone. just walked away. she also mentioned she cried alot at lunch because the time came for lunch to be over and my daughter hadnt finished her apple or milk and the teacher said to throw it away and my daughter wanted to save her apple in her lunch box.

my daughter now says she does not want to go back to school. she complained of her tummy hurting and was complaining alot of a headache until she basicly passed out on our couch. didnt eat very much dinner at all. and judging by her very tiny amount gone from her lunch box, i thought she would have been starved.

about the “smack”, which is a huge issue for us.. we were informed a week ago at orientation that there was goign to be a form to allow or to not allow any form of corporal punishment for the students, which would be handed out within the next month or so. we have not signed this form yet.. and plan on signing to NOT allow it. we do not believe spanking is an effective form of discipline and believe it can cause more harm than good. so i most certainly do not want this used on our child by a person she just met, let alone on her first day of school.. which seems to have been a pretty rotten first impression.

my husband and i are so extremely stressed and it is obvious our daughter is too. we’re almost ready to pull her out and homeschool for a year or 2. her education and emotional health are very important to us and we want the best for her, but i have the feeling this public school isnt going to be the best.

has anyone who just read this essay been through anything like this and how did you handle it?

any advice will be appreciated.

Betty answers:

Wow. There is so much going on here.

1. The corporal punishment:

I would never allow my three children to go to a school that practiced corporal punishment on them or other children. It is a poor example of how to solve problems. It does not teach any social skills. Research has shown that while corporal punishment is very effective in stopping behavior short term, it is not an effective long term solution. The undesired behavior continues or goes underground. The child may also build up resentment, seek revenge, or retreat emotionally, or engage in a powere struggle. The research also shows that corporal punishment has negative lonterm consequences for the child.

I would look for a school that bases their discipline policy on Positive Discipline. It teaches personal responsibility and critical thinking. A close second would be a school endorsing a Love and Logic style approach. But too often teachers untrained in the method turn logical consequences into punishment.

Teachers practicing positive discipline would never make an arbitrary authoritative demand like throwing away a lunch that a child wants to keep. It is ridiculous how some schools treat kids and the demands they place on them. How would you like a coworker to tell you to throw away your lunch? Children also deserve respect.

Here are some references to get you started:

http://parentingmethods.suite101.com/article.cfm/positive_discipline_methods

http://parentingmethods.suite101.com/article.cfm/avoiding_child_power_struggles

2. Gifted issues:

My daughter was reading at a fourth grade level when she started preK. She was frustrated with the class, had a hard time making friends, and generally acted out because she was bored. She would not follow directions or rules that had no logic or meaning to her (such as your daughter’s apple experience). The teacher didn’t think to explain the logic of the request. She went from loving learning to despising school. She started dumbing down to fit in and started avoiding actual academic challenges because she started getting used to things being so easy and requiring no effort.

We had our daughter assessed by a gifted specialist at a regional university. The first recommendation was homeschooling; the second option was grade acceleration. We put our daughter in a private school where the teacher can meet her academic needs. We also allowed her to skip a grade. The emotional and social issues disappeared. She is still an emotionally sensitive child, as are many gifted kids. But she loves school, is challenged, and fits.

Acceleration was an option for our daughter because she was advanced in all academic areas and ready socially, emotionally, and physically. The best option for your daughter will depend on her individual needs, but there are some objective tools to determine this.

Have your daughter assessed for giftedness. This can often be done in your school district, but interviewer bias can influence recommendations (but not test results). I’d go with an outsider.

If homeschooling, subject acceleration, or grade acceleration are recommended, you will need to be an advocate. If acceleration is an option, ask that the Iowa Acceleration Scale be used to make a determination. This tool can also direct you to more appropriate options if acceleration isn’t in your daughter’s best interests.

Here are more resources:

http://parentingagiftedchild.suite101.com/article.cfm/grade_skipping_your_gifted_student

http://assessing-gifted-children.suite101.com/article.cfm/outoflevel_achievement_and_aptitude_testing

The risk of doing nothing is that your daughter will become a gifted underachiever. Here is some info:

http://parentingagiftedchild.suite101.com/article.cfm/underachieving_gifted_kids

Best of luck to you. Regardless of your other actions, she really needs to change schools and you should strongly consider gifted assessment.

Michael asks…

heres a package of my favorite jokes! (wait for the additional details)!?

A 5-year-old kid was celebrating Christmas. He was amazed with every present that everyone got. He was so excited that his parents let him open all of theirs too. He finally opened the biggest present which was a massage chair, a gift his grandma gave to his parents. The next week when he was back in school, the kindergarten teacher asked the children to tell about the present that received. The child said, I got a fire truck, mittens, a shirt, and a spider man toy! But mommy and daddy got the coolest present. They got a vibrator, its really fun, you should all try it!

A mother was having a headache, and her son was misbehaving. She got tired of him throwing things around and slamming pots and pans together, so she stopped him and told him one of her “secrets.” She told him, “Every time you misbehave, or do something bad, I get another gray hair. So please be quiet and let mommy sleep, okay?” the little boy thought for a moment, and then said “wow, you must’ve been a really bad girl when you were little. just look at grandma!”
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.”

So the next Sunday he took the monsignor’s advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon return to his office after mass, he found the following note on his door:

1. Sip the Vodka, don’t gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ***. 6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior, and Spook.
8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the **** out of him.
9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, don’t say he was stoned of
don’t say he was stoned off his ***.
10. We do not refer to the cross as the Big T!
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, “Take this and eat it, for it is my body”, he did not say, “Eat me.”
12. The Virgin Mary is not referred to as the, “Mary with the Cherry”.
13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: “Rub-A-dub-dub, thanks for the grub, yeah God.”
14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy-pulling contest at St. Peter’s, not a peter-pulling contest at St. Taffy’s.
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all.

They sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight.

They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and whichever side’s dog won would be entitled to dominate the world.

Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and bred them with the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves.

They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from each litter, removed his siblings, which gave him all the milk.

After 5 years, they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever seen. It’s cage needed steel bars that were 5″ thick and nobody could get near it.

When the day came for the dog fight, Bush showed up with a strange looking animal. It was a 9 foot long Dachshund.

Everyone felt sorry for Bush because they knew there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with the Afghanistani dog.

When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came o
of it’s cage and slowly waddled over towards Osama’s dog.

Osama’s dog snarled and leaped out of it’s cage and charged the American Dachshund, but when it got close enough to bite the Dachshund’s neck, the Dachshund opened it’s mouth and consumed Osama’s dog in one bite.

There was nothing left at all of his dog. Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief.

“We don’t understand how this could have happened. We had our best people working for 5 years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves.”

“That’s nothing,” said Bush.

“We had our best plastic surgeons working for 5 years to make that alligator look like a weenie dog.”
What is the meaning of divorce?

Ah, yes, “Divorce”, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.
Five Englishmen in an Audi Quattro arrived at an Irish border checkpoint.

Paddy the officer stops them and tells them: “It is illegal to put 5 people in a Quattro, Quattro means four”

“Quattro is just the name of the automobile,” the Englishmen retorts disbelievingly. “Look at the papers: this car is designed to carry five persons.”

“You can not pull that one on me,” replies Paddy “Quattro means four. You have five people in your car and you are therefore breaking the law.”

The Englishmen replies angrily, “You idiot! Call your supervisor over – I want to speak to someone with more intelligence!”

“Sorry,” responds Paddy, “Murphy is busy with 2 guys in a Fiat Uno.

Haha mary poppins style!

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little,which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.

This made him…what?

“A super callused fragile mystic hexed by
hexed by halitosis!”

This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.

Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.

Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees the North to avoid a collision.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES’ ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, THAT’S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE
THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call!

In the men’s room at work, the Boss had placed a sign directly above the sink

. It had a single word on it — “Think!”

The next day, when he went to the men’s room, he looked at the sign, and right below, immediately above the soap dispenser, someone had carefully lettered another sign which read —

“Thoap!”

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man’s tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, “Say, Father, what causes arthritis?”

“My Son, it’s caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man.”

“Well, I’ll be damned,” the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man
nudged the man and apologized.

“I’m very sorry. I didn’t mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?”

“I don’t have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.”

10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge!
8. Counselor, let’s do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last
minute.
6. Is it a penal offense?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be
good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one
he could.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty in law but isn’t:
1. Think you can get me off?
A snake and a rabbit were racing along a pair of intersecting forest pathways one day, when they collided at the intersection. They immediately began to argue with one another as to who was at fault for the mishap.

When the snake remarked that he had been blind since birth, and thus should be given additional leeway, the rabbit said that he, too, had been blind since birth. The two animals then forgot about the collision and began commiserating concerning the problems of being blind.

The snake said that his greatest regret was the loss of his identity. He had never been able to see his reflection in the water, and for that reason did not know exactly what he looked like, or even what he was. The rabbit declared that he had the same problem. Seeing a way that they could help each other, the rabbit proposed that one feel the other from head to toe, and then try to describe what the other animal was.

The snake agreed, and started by winding himself around the rabbit. After a few moment
After a few moments, he announced, “You’ve got very soft, fuzzy fur, long ears, big rear feet, and a little fuzzy ball for a tail. I think that you must be a bunny rabbit!”

The rabbit was much relieved to find his identity, and proceeded to return the favor to the snake. After feeling about the snake’s body for a few minutes, he asserted, “Well, you’re scaly, you’re slimy, you’ve got beady little eyes, you squirm and slither all the time, and you’ve got a forked tongue. I think you’re a lawyer!”

A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says “You can’t bring that dog in here!” The guy, without missing a beat, says “This is my seeing-eye dog.” “Oh man, ” the bartender says, “I’m sorry, here, the first one’s on me.” The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door.

Another guy walks in the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says “You can’t bring that dog in here unless you tell him it’s a seeing-eye
seeing-eye dog.” The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says “Hey, you can’t bring that dog in here!”

The second man replies “This is my seeing-eye dog.” The bartender says, “No, I don’t think so. They do not have Chihuahuas as seeing-eye dogs.” The man pauses for a half-second and replies “What?!?! They gave me a Chihuahua?!?”

Betty answers:

Amazing thank you so much! Xoxoxo

John asks…

My 7 year old DD is VERY smart. What do I suggest at a VERY unsupportive school?

We are in a FAILING school. They didnt pass the No Child Left Behind act for the past 2 years. We had our house on the market for an entire year last year and it didnt sell. We’re putting it back on the market on the spring, so please dont mention that. With the sucky housing market, it just isnt selling right now.

So more about the situation. In October of Kindergarten she was reading at a 3rd grade level and would have been eligible for the Gifted program, but the school doesnt offer it until 3rd grade (I think..). So what the school did is sent her to 1st grade from 9-1 every day (K was only 8:30-11:10 daily).
In February of 1st grade (2007) she was reading at a 5th grade level. She’s also very smart at math, but Im not sure of the level she’s at. The school had her in an advanced reading class, but that was it. The principal REFUSED to advance her, thinking she wouldn’t be socially/emotionally advanced enough.

Ok, so now onto this year. Its only day 3 of school, so I dont want to start annoying the new teacher already. There is also a new principal, so should I bring up skipping a grade again? My daughter is just amazing with school and learning.

I am in NO way racist or anything like that, but we live in a predominately Hispanic area. On the “report card” for the school, it said 11% white and 65% Hispanic, with 31% being “limited english proficient rate” and 71% being low income rate (I am NOT saying that all the that 71% low income are Hispanic. Im sure some of those are white too). So we have the option to send her to another local school, but ALL of the other ones suck too!!! We cant afford private. Give me options to ask about at our current school???

Betty answers:

You have no options at your current school.

Schools are not set up to teach exceptional students, whether they are gifted, learning disabled, or have some other special need.

Many parents in your situation find that homeschooling is in their child’s best interests. This site: http://homeschooling.gomilpitas.com/weblinks/gifted.htm will give you more information.

All the best.

Betty asks…

Sophmore son in high school goes from honor roll to flunking.?

My son use to LOVE-LOVE science! When he was in kindergarten, he cried to be in the 4th grade science fair, and they let him. Then he spent evey summer @ our local community college in the gifted and talented science classes, until he was 12. Then they had nothing for his age.
Now, as he s 16, he is failing everything. I uninstalled a bunch of his VIDEO GAMES, but “STEAM”, he is addicted to. My husband goes to the tennis court, and does not take this seriously. HE IS FAILING 3 subjects. AP/BIOLOGY (which I always thought he should not take at such a young age) Spanish and ENGLISH. He is flunking ENGLISH! I have sat with him, mom to son, as we have a very close bond. He use to talk about SALVIA, and I found it in his room and dumped it in the garbage. It is almost like, the fact that he used it a few times, his brain is just gone.
What can I do? I tried calling and emailing EVERY teacher. I cannot get the MAGNET school social worker to call me back. (she has a bunch of schools to go to) I am ready to take him to a therapist I used a few years ago. Is this going overboard?
He use to play the sax in band from 6-8 grade. He is is NO extracurricular activity, so he has no excuse to FAIL. He cannot be in the ROBOTICS CLUB because of his grades. The Magnet School is for SCIENCE & ENGINEERING, because it USE to be his passion. Now, he has NO passion for anything. What can I do?
Thanks for the response(s). I contacted the school social worker, and she is just too busy with kids with worse problems. He just had a physical with his pediatrician. He IS addicted to games, and he has admitted this already. “I am not going to play the games anymore”.
The SALVIA was dumped in the trash. My husband went out and bought him a headset, so he listens to music very loud, while studying? I finally stole the headset and hid it. Someone has to be the adult here. I am going to call my therapist, and tell him what is going on and be very honest, about the salvia and the video world he has entered into. It is a scary path he has chosen.
I already found out about study groups. He has been staying after school 3 afternoons a week. (until 5:30PM) yet he still flunked the 3 classes he stayed after for. How can this happen? He is staying after, and failing. His english teacher takes no assignments late, and he is just stubborn, as she seems to have gone negative as 80% of her class f

Betty answers:

You can try to contact some local, state, or national social agencies, Department of Health or Education or some other government agency to see if they could give any advice, information, resources and etc. To see if they could help you out in this matter and situation

Also have you taken your son to a doctor, psychologist, and etc. To have him evaluated or examined? Maybe they can give you some good recommendations or advice on how to turn around this situation

You can also try hiring a tutor or you can contact this school to see if they have any tutoring support or resources such as tutors, study groups, instructional materials, educational software and etc. That could help your son to learn and understand the subject a lot better

Also you could try to contact some computer stores or companies to see if they keep help you find a way to restrict or monitor how your son uses a computer…it really sounds that one of the problems your son has is that he is addicted to spending too much time using a computer

Good luck and I hope this will help

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